How do I choose who gets job referral bonus credit?

Dear JT & Dale: I saw a job posting online at a company I really want to work for. I have several friends who work there. They all told me that if I see a job I want to do, tell them because they get a referral bonus. I’m afraid to do this because only one friend will get the referral bonus and the other two will be upset. What should I do? –Vince

JT: The simple answer is to rethink who is the first person to ask to recommend you and tell you about the referral bonus. Whoever it is should be the recipient of the referral. That way, you can just tell the other two that, in fairness, that’s how you made the decision. I hope they will understand that this is the fairest way to do things.

VALLEY: Well, fairness is hard to argue with, but it’s too important not to be strategic. I therefore invite you to think about the recommendation that would most increase your chances of being hired. If any of the friends got promoted or got bonuses or proof of being a rising star, then you have your answer. Even so, see if you can’t include all three in your application and interviews, and that way you can tell them you hope they all get a bonus. Then, if you’re hired, invite them to dinner to celebrate with you. If you’re lucky, whoever got the bonus will offer you to buy.

Dear JT & Dale: I am a fresh graduate living at home while I look for a job. My parents are unhappy with me because they expect me to apply for any job I’m even remotely qualified for. I graduated with an engineering degree and I want to be very intentional about who I work for. Many possible employers in my area are companies that I disagree with about the type of work they do. My parents are upset that I let my beliefs get in the way of my work. They say I have to get a job and then after working there for a few years move on. I do not agree. But that said, it’s been six months since I graduated and I still don’t have a job. How can I stay true to my convictions and find a job? –Jadyne

news : To begin with, as a sign of good faith towards your parents, you should go get some hourly job that will allow you to contribute to the household income.

VALLEY: It would definitely help them be more supportive of a longer search, especially if you were to do relevant work, perhaps through a temp agency.

JT: Second, you need to be much clearer about who you want to work for. If you have strong philosophical and personal beliefs, you will need to identify at least 20 companies that align with those. Then you need to start networking with people who work in those companies. Recent graduates are more successful in getting jobs by referral. Getting introduced is one of the best ways to be considered for a job. Learning to leverage the power of tools like LinkedIn can be a great way for you to connect with people who can connect you with hiring managers. Unfortunately, it’s not something they taught you in school, although they should have. Targeting your job search to companies that match your beliefs is one of the smartest things you can do because once you land a job, you’ll be excited about the opportunity.

VALLEY: Plus, it will give you a different mindset when it comes to job hunting, with the positive replacing the negative. You want to find an energy that will pull you forward, and that’s something your parents will feel. They want what’s best for you, and if they see your search as energized and uplifting instead of (in their minds) picky and complaining, they’ll share the excitement of landing a real professional job.

Jeanine “JT” Tanner O’Donnell is a career coach and founder of the leading career site Dale Dauten is the founder of The Innovators’ Lab and the author of an HR novel, “The Weary Optimist”. Please visit them at, where you can email questions, or write to them c/o King Features Syndicate, 628 Virginia Dr., Orlando, FL 32803. (c) 2022 by King Features Syndicate, Inc .

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